How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
I had nothing but condoms at the checkout, then grabbed a pack of Orbitz gum and said "gotta protect from bad breath" felt like a boss
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
Randomize
