I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
Randomize
