whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Randomize
