I just walked into the kitchen and my dad was having this uber serious convo
With himself
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
Randomize
