I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
I have post one night stand depression
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