I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
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