That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
Randomize
