Whoa Z and x make the same sound
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
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