I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
apparently the secret to your success is patron
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
Randomize
