if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
Randomize