and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
I have so many feelings about this burrito
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
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