So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
Randomize
