Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
Randomize
