let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
Condoms? Check. Glitter? Check. Fuck me pumps? Double check. Dignity? No where to be found. I'm about to homewreck the shit out of that dumb bitch.
I've been meaning to talk to you about your lack of self-respect these days and the toll it's taking on your vagina.
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
Hey I'm at the gym and I need your personal trainer help. Also can you send me that picture of me eating a sausage. I want to post it on instgram.
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