Are we in a gay sports bar?
it's not cheating when I paid for it
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
Randomize
