you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
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