everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
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