In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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