States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
I had not one but two drunk coworkers text me and hit on me tonight. I feel like I've finally been accepted into my dysfunctional workplace
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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