Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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