Why is half of me covered in green stuff that won't come off?
You stripper-danced on a light pole in the quad. It had fresh paint on it.
Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
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