Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
I apparently used the line "I'm a bouncer too so i would know if I were too drunk" then they asked me to leave.
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
I'll truly miss your penis but your use of words and phrases such as bae, yolo, swag, and totes have ruined how attractive you once were.
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
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