Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
Come back. Shots need mouths.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
Randomize
