Ew, dude I just walked in on my boss masturbating in the supply room at the restaurant. He didn't see me so I quickly shut the door and pretended like it didn't happen. And then literally five minutes later he came up to me and cupped my face with his hands and told me what a great employee I was. I got a promotion but I'm fucking scarred for life. I can't stop cringing.
Life lesson: Don't ever put your penis in a crazy girl. Especially if she's married. And has a kid.
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
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