Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
Side note: I apologize for sex being the subject of every single one of my texts. That's what happens when you date an older man who constantly denies you sex on the basis of his ridiculous morals.
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
Randomize
