Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
Randomize
