am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
Randomize
