i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
