no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
Randomize
