SEEEEXXX PLEASE
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
Last night when I was hammered I set a reminder to tell you that your boobs are my favorite ones in the world, so this is me giving you that message.
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
Randomize
