I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize
