i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
I walked from the hotel to the club with a pint of tequila in my boot. Poured some in a homeless woman's mouth when she asked for change. I've hit rock bottom.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
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