If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
Randomize
