yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
Randomize
