Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
So he ended up having sex with me, but it was so awkward. When it was over, he went to the bathroom, and he came back and asked, "are you on your period or something? there's blood on my dick..." and i said, "well it was supposed to start today, nice surprise...i am so embarrassed." and he said ,"it's better than you queefing." and as soon as he said that, i queef the hardest and loudest i ever had.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts
What kind of scumbag goes to a baby's 1st birthday party with a black eye? This kind. Me. I'm disgraceful.
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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