just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
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