It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
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