I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
Randomize
