its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
It was like getting head from an anaconda
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
Randomize
