ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
I am watching Grease 2 and properly learning how to apply a condom to a banana. This is a sign from God that this is the closest I will ever get to having the need for one.
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
Randomize