I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
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