I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
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