There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
"I wasn't planning on buying a chicken, but I bought it anyway." --some guy on the bus with a chicken
"Yeah, I only have nine toes." --that same guy
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
Randomize
