Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
After last night, I think I need a service animal to monitor the life choices I make when I'm inebriated. A monkey, or a clever dog. Or a really assertive parrot.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Randomize
