Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
I have aggressive nipples.
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
