Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
Listening to my boss get blown in the next room by a male bartender from the gay bar. And watching pawnstars. Tell me I'm not the best wingman ever.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
the cop found his r2d2 bong and asked me if i ever smoked out of him. i'm like, no sir. he's like ahh. if i were to smoke, it'd definitely be out of some star wars character.
easily made my night.
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