I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize
