Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize
