I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
is it weird that i blow-dry my hair and poop at the same time?
not any weirder than you telling me this at 4 in the morning
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
Need ride home. Girls. Stolen keg. Rolling down streets. Horny girls. No condoms. Rescue needed. girls and beer in exchange for rescue and bacon?
I. Hate. You. Where are you, are said girls cute, and how did you know I bought bacon? And how does this always happen to you?
Smarter than the average bear
he's single and there are thong briefs.
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
Randomize
