I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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